Hunger Strike...

I have to have the weirdest dog ever. Myst is currently on a hunger strike because Kaia got new dog food and she wants it too. Myst has to be on a special dog food because she is prone to getting bladder stones, which, if she does get them, it will require surgery. She doesn't really "like" her food, but she usually eats her 1/2 cup twice a day with no problems. She's eaten maybe a cup since I got Kaia the new food. I know she's not sick, she's just stubborn. (Don't know who she got that from... lol). She'll eat when she gets hungry enough. My dog is such a brat! lol

I should really be going to bed, but I've been having trouble sleeping again. Last night I had a really weird dream too. Not sure what to do about the sleep situation because I definitely don't want to be on anymore medication.

I really need to get cracking on some homework this weekend. I've been procrastinating so bad this semester... 10 time worse than my other semesters. I think that is the biggest draw back to taking online classes.

Sometimes I really worry about my parents. I'm scared that one day I'm going to wake up and one of them is going to be gone. My mom went to the doctor today and found out that her blood pressure medicine wasn't working at all anymore and that was why she has been feeling so crappy like ALL summer. Today her blood pressure was 180/100.. which is AWFUL!! Much higher than that and she could have had a stroke or heart attack. I'm also worried because she smokes and like 7-8 years ago they found pre-cancerous cells on her vocal cords, which was most likely caused by smoking. I want her to quit so bad. I want her to be able to see her grandchildren grow up. I also worry about my dad. He had partial blockages in her arteries a couple years ago and had like a warning attack. It wasn't a heart attack, but he body was trying to get his attention and tell him that something needed to change. I just don't know what to do and I feel so helpless at times because I'm so far away. I'm not there to kick their asses into gear. When I was still living at home I would make them "heart healthy" meals out of the American Heart Society cookbook and things, but that's all gone to the side now that I'm gone. I just want them to be around for many many more years.

I mean I know I'm not perfect and I need to do a better job... but geez. I eat pretty health most of the time, I just have trouble dropping the weight because of the PCOS. I'm sure some people think that I use that as an excuse, but they should do some research before they start to judge. I would LOVE to lose weight and I try hard to, but nothing seems to work. I usually eat about 1500 calories a day and I walk and play with the dogs and things. I also do either a "Shimmy" or "Bollywood" exercise program a couple times a week. You would think with that something would happen, but I've been at a standstill for almost a month now. Before that I had lost about 10lbs. It's just so frustrating when it just stops!

Wishes Happiness Was As Contagious as the Clap

I think that everyone being down and depressed on Facebook and other outlets is seriously effecting my mood. I can't really ignore them. I have to be a friend and try to be understanding, but where do I draw the line? I'm not talking about those that occassionally say "Life sucks, etc." I'm talking about the ones that have to find something to bitch about in every single status update they make. More people need to turn their frowns upside down. There is always something positive in your life if you look at it. Yeah some things may suck, I know that better than most, but it's all how you look at it. If you dwell on the negative then of course you're going to be uphappy. I know I used to be this way. I used to be the Queen of Negativity, but I'm trying to turn over a new leaf. I want to be happy for once and look at the positive side of things. Life is to short to be unhappy all the time.

The good things in my life:

1. My loving husband. Yes he has his moments when he's a jerkface, but I know he loves me.

2. My friends, both new and old. I miss my old friends from my hometown and from college, but the ones that really matter are still my friends no matter how far apart we are. And my new friends, I have to admit I have finally met some pretty awesome ladies up here in North Dakota.

3. My awesome parents. I just want to say that my parents rock my socks. My mom is my best friend and I'm so glad that we have such a wonderful relationship.

4. The rest of the family. Most of them are pretty awesome :)

5. My super awesome dog Myst and Thayer's pain in the ass Kaia. Myst has been my rock and baby for over 6 years now, and I don't know how I would have gotten through some things without her.

6. Food to eat. I have food to eat. Enough said. I can be happy for the little things in life.

7. My house. I love my house other than the stupid tile.

8. Good books. I have read so many good books in my life. Some funny, some inspirational. Who couldn't be happy about good books?

There are a lot of other things in my life that make me happy.