This is a window into my life.... Infertility, Pregnancy Loss, Marriage, Weight Loss Surgery, and finally... a multiple pregnancy.

Learn more about my Infertility Journey here:
3 years and counting

Welcome to the World Orion and Ronin!

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Monday, February 25, 2013

17 week bumpdate!

Today marks 17 weeks! Another week down... about 21 to go if I make it to term with the dynamic duo! Term for twins is 38 weeks. The babies are each about the size of an onion. Their cartilage is now turning to bone and they have begun putting on some fat.

I'm feeling them move more and more. Yesterday I had a lopsided belly. They both must have been hanging out on the right side as it was pushed out about an inch further than my left side for a while. They really, really like food. After I eat, they get pretty active. I'm so excited for the day that Thayer can feel them move around too.

I'm still down almost 2lbs from my pre-pregnancy weight even though all I do all days is eat... and eat... and eat. I'm trying my very, very hardest to give the babies all that they need.

Thayer is finally bonding with the babies. For the longest time he was scared to because of the baby we lost. He didn't want to get attached then have something happen to this pregnancy as well. He told me the other day that he's no longer scared that we'll lose them. I would be lying if I didn't have worries at times that the next time we have an ultrasound they'll only find one heartbeat. I thought hitting the 2nd trimester would end my fears, but unfortunately that hasn't been the case.

I'm sure I'll have a lot more to write after we have our appointment on Wednesday. I'm thinking about taking a recording of their heartbeats. It will be the first time we've actually heard them. The other times we saw them on the ultrasound, but couldn't hear them.

I'm starting to look and feel huge. I know that's just going to continue to get worse. At least I look pregnant now, I just look far more pregnant than I am... lol.

Now for a progression of pictures... pre-pregnancy, 13 weeks, and today... 17 weeks... Oh... and all this change with still no weight gain.


13 weeks...

17 weeks (Current)
17 weeks... a view from the top. Belly officially bigger than boobs.

Monday, February 18, 2013

16 week -- 4 month Bumpdate!

Well I'm well into my 2nd trimester now! I woke up Sunday morning crying because all I could think of was how lucky I am and how I never thought the day would come that I would be a mother to a child on earth. I felt silly, but I can't even begin to explain how overwhelmed with emotions I was as I laid there in bed next to my husband with my growing belly.

So... an update on the babies and me. The babies are forming the bones in their ears... lol. Guess I better watch what I'm saying and yelling :-P  They are also developing tastes buds and getting hair including eyelashes and eyebrows. It makes me wonder what color of hair they will have. Red runs in both Thayer's and my family. His mom and dad have auburn hair and his sister is strawberry blonde. I have tons of natural red highlights. Wouldn't two little red-headed twins be cute? (.... oh.... but imagine the tempers attitudes!!) The last few days I've really been able to feel them moving, especially after I eat and whenever I have anything with any type of sugar. Sugar = baby crack. It seems to cause a disco in my belly. It's weird feeling one move on one side then the other move on the other. Sometimes it's still sinking in that we're having two babies. Sometimes I even forget for a second or two. It's exciting and scary all at once. So many people have told me how lucky I am to be having twins, but inside I'm petrified that I'm not going to be able to take care of them while pregnant and how we will provide everything for them after they arrive. Thayer is going to have such a huge learning curve. I hope that I can semi-prepare him for everything that is going to happen.

Our next doctor appointment is February 27th, I will be just over 17 weeks along. We'll get to hear both babies heartbeats through the doppler and they will do my next stage of blood work. Also at that time they will schedule my anatomy scan to make sure they are growing correctly and to see what sex they are. I'm STILL holding out hope that there is a little girl in there along with a boy. That would be ideal, but I'll be happy so long as they are both healthy. I'm going to try to have the anatomy scan over Spring Break so I don't have to take time off of work. So that will be the around the 2nd week in March.

My belly has really started getting large in the last 1-2 weeks. I know that it's only going to get much, much bigger. The babies are supposed to double in size over the next 4 weeks. I've been eating a lot more the last 3-4 days. It seems like the only thing I do is eat, sleep, and pee. I'm finally almost back up to my pre-pregnancy weight. That's a good thing. I know I will certainly have a lot of trouble gaining the proper amount of weight throughout this pregnancy.

This weekend we went home to Kansas to visit family and friends. Mom and I went baby shopping all day on Saturday. We got lots of deals such as a bag full of neutral clothes for 75% off! I also got a penguin bath towel because I have a penguin obsession. I went out to lunch with some of my best friends from high school. It's always good to catch up with them. It's amazing how even after 10 years we can always manage to pick up right where we left off no matter what or where we've been. It's amazing and they're amazing :) I'm lucky to have such great, supportive people in my life!

Bump Picture!

Monday, February 11, 2013

15 week bumpdate!

Today marks 15 weeks! Not a whole lot new to report. Energy is still good, especially in the mornings. It definitely starts tapering off in the afternoon. I know they're definitely growing in there because I'm just getting bigger and bigger. Even week to week there is a noticeable difference. I had NO morning sickness this week (please don't be jinxing myself!!). I've also been feeling more and more flutters. Tonight after dinner I felt it a few times. I can't wait until Thayer can feel it too. I'm still down 4 pounds from the day I found out I was pregnant. I haven't gained any weight at all. It worries me, but I know they are growing and they're healthy and strong and that is the most important thing.

This weekend I was stretched out on the couch checking out my belly and looking at it, the left side was raised up about an inch higher than the right. I had Thayer come and check it out. Then I started wiggling and pushing on it and he freaked. He's scared that I'm going to hurt them when I do this (cause brain damage or something). I tried to explain to him they are in a big old bag of protective "water" and the only thing that would hurt them would be be a significant trauma like getting punched in the stomach or being in a car accident with the seat belt. I don't think it worked very well or eased his mind much. It's kinda cute/endearing... and a little annoying. I mean it is, after all, my body! lol

I spilled the beans at work last week. The principal was happy for me as was the teacher I'm working with. That made me feel better. It seemed legitimate as well, not like they were faking it. I haven't clued them in on the twin thing yet, that's coming on Wednesday. I thought I would ease them into the idea. *sigh* I feel kinda yucky about hiding things, but I wasn't sure what else to do.

I do have an interview for 2 different teaching jobs on Wednesday. I hope they go well. I will feel really bad for having to leave the job I just took, but a teaching job pays so much more and it's what I really want to do with my life. I'm just too good of a person at times I think. I'm at the point, though, where I have to start looking out for number one and what will be best for my life and my future (and that of my family). That is what is most important.

I'm finally starting to think that I actually look pregnant and not just fat or like I have a beer belly. I hope that other people can tell as well. I've never been so self-conscious in my life! Even when I weight 250+ pounds I wasn't this worried about how I looked.

My next doctor's appointment is Feb. 27th. I'll be just over 17 weeks then. I'm excited, but kind of bummed that we won't get to see the babies at this appointment. We'll get to hear their heartbeats through the doppler and they'll schedule me for my next round of tests as well as my anatomy scan at 20 weeks! We will know what we are having in less than 5 weeks! How did we ever make it to this point?!? I'm so lucky to be growing two healthy babies after struggling for so long. My heart is overflowing. Though I do certainly feel overwhelmed at times at the prospect of caring for two infants, I know we will do well. It won't always be easy... and it certainly won't be boring!

Monday, February 4, 2013

14 week bumpdate!

Oh glorious 2nd trimester... how I love thee! :) I'm finally starting to get some energy back. I actually cleaned the house this last weekend. I don't feel completely exhausted all the time. It's a welcome relief! Also, the nausea is all but gone. I think I got really lucky in that regard, especially with having two babies growing in there and pumping hormones into my system. I only had 3-4 weeks of bad morning sickness. It could have been much, much worse. Hopefully I'm not jinxing myself either. My most exciting development in the last week is feeling one (or both) of them move. I know in my heart that's what it was. It seriously felt like a fish in a fish bag like when you bring them home from the pet shop. I don't know any other way to describe it. It is also 6 weeks or less until we know for certain whether there's 2 hot dogs, 2 buns, or a hot dog and a bun cooking in there. (Eloquent aren't I?... lol).

Our little babies are now the size of little lemons. Each baby is about 3.4 inches and 1.5 ounces, they have almost doubled in weight since last week. Pretty impressive little bugs they are! They have also started growing hair! I've been having more and more body aches. Round ligament pains have started. I also get hip pain now and again. I know that's probably my hips preparing for the babies to arrive. Other than that, things are going splendidly. I have no complaints.

Oh oh!! The other day my mom bought us 2 car seats via a sale at Babies R Us! They arrived on our doorstep tonight! That made this whole "twin" thing seem a lot more real. TWO CAR SEATS! Holy Moly! I love them! The seat themselves are super light when not attached to the base which is great since I'm going to have to be lugging around 2 of them. They are gray, red, and black. (Red is my favorite color.) They are also very gender neutral. Thanks mom! It was fun giving Thayer a brief carseat lesson too. He's never really been around infants so this going to be very interesting. I don't think he'll be taking them anywhere by himself... lol probably EVER, so I'll be able to help him out and teach him about everything.


I also filed our taxes today. We're getting a really nice return, which will definitely help out with buying baby stuff times 2. Next year we'll have 2 deductions... lol. >.<

Last but not least... here is the latest bump photo. It's grown even the last week. I still feel like I just look fat, but hopefully soon I'll look pregnant. lol in another 14 weeks I'll look like I'm about to pop.

This is what 14 weeks worth of twins looks like!

Saturday, February 2, 2013

I Don't Think That Was Gas...

So I'm pretty sure I felt one (or both) of the babies move yesterday. I wasn't gassy at all. To me it felt like when you're swimming in a lake and a fish grazes your leg underwater... but it was in my tummy about 4-5 inches below my belly button. It felt like a little slither sensation in there. I felt it a couple of times throughout the day. I felt it once or twice today as well and I haven't had any gas.

I can't wait until the day that Thayer can feel them moving too. I hope they karate chop him! lol... wait... that would mean they are chopping my insides too!

The top of my uterus is now just slightly below my belly button. I'm really self-conscious. I think I just look fat and not pregnant. I have a feeling I'm going to struggle a lot with the "feeling fat" thing. I just was finally getting used to being "skinny." We went out today to grab a bite to eat (I was really craving a reuben) and I just couldn't figure out anything that made me look like I wasn't huge. I hope I look pregnant to other people instead of just extra chubby.

So, I'm going to tell my boss on Monday that I'm pregnant. I decided I'm going to tell a little white lie about it. I just don't want it to seem like I was hiding something from them, though I was. I don't know if I would have gotten hired at all if they knew, for one. Also, I wasn't comfortable sharing the news with anyone other than family/friends until I was in the "safe zone." I really have no idea what their reaction will be. All I can do is hope for the best. I'm going to tell the principal first and go from there. I'm super nervous, but I know I can't put it off any longer because my tummy is only getting bigger and bigger every day.