This is a window into my life.... Infertility, Pregnancy Loss, Marriage, Weight Loss Surgery, and finally... a multiple pregnancy.

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Friday, November 11, 2011

2 for One

So, today was Veteran's Day and today was also my due date with our angel baby.

My goal today was to try and keep as busy as possible so I couldn't think about the latter of the two, too much. I think I accomplished my goal rather well. This afternoon Thayer and I went ice skating for free for Veteran's Day. Then we went out to lunch which made me sick for a while. The food just didn't agree with my tummy and I got to truly experience "dumping syndrome" for the first time. Needless to say, I don't want to experience it again any time soon. Sweating, nausea, the shakes... yep... wasn't a good time especially since we were at the mall. We walked around the mall for a bit and I ended up getting a coat at Old Navy for 60% off. It's super cute, but a little small right now. I should be able to fit into it by the end of the month at the rate I've been going. I also bought Just Dance 3. I had been using Just Dance 2 as part of my workout routine besides the elliptical. It's a little more challenging and has a lot of songs I like. Lets see... then we went to the Chiropractor and got snap, crackled, and popped. I feel better now. My hips not bothering me anymore! Then we went to see Immortals. It was pretty hokey and not nearly as good as 300. We were both pretty disappointed in it. On the way home we got Jimmy Johns. It was a pretty good day considering. I'm glad I got to share it with my Airman.

As far as Veteran's Day, I'm so proud of my husband and the service he has provided to this country. I'm also proud of my dad who served in the Air Force. Also, my Grandpa Mallatt who served courageously in WWII in the Pacific theater. I have many other family members that are veteran's as well. Words can not express the debt we, as a country, owe you. I know how hard the military works; I've seen it first hand. The work for little pay and at times, little respect. I was pleasantly surprised to all the praise I saw this morning in everyone's statuses on Facebook. It seemed like everyone on my friend's list said something of praise and/or thanks for those that have or are currently serving.

As for my angel baby. I miss her every day. I don't think that will ever change. I really thought today was going to be much harder than it actually was. This morning I had a moment, shed a couple of tears, then got ready to start my day. March 29th and November 11th 2011 are days that I will never forget as long as I live. Sometimes I still have moments where I'm sad and I have moments of jealousy. Things are honestly so much better now than they were 6 months ago. I know my little angel is in heaven and I'll get to see her one day, but until then I know that she is in good hands. I'm a mom now and I'll be a mom for the rest of my life. My baby, Baby Hope, was simply too beautiful and perfect for this earth. I was shown a brief piece of heaven in those few short weeks. I know that one day I will be a mother. I've come so far and done so much to try and have my perfect child. I hope that we will be able to start trying next September or so. We shall see what happens with my weightloss.

I'm down 39 pounds in 9 weeks, so I have 67 pounds to go until my goal weight. Would I be happy losing more than that? Sure, the doctor predicted a loss of 100lbs so that is what I'm going by to set my goal.

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