This is a window into my life.... Infertility, Pregnancy Loss, Marriage, Weight Loss Surgery, and finally... a multiple pregnancy.

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Saturday, January 8, 2011

"I'm doing this for the baby... I'm doing this for the baby."

Disclaimer: Some of the following blog may be TMI for you, so if you don't want to know, then don't read.

So yesterday I went in to the hospital to have my ultrasound done. As I suspected, it was what they call a pelvic ultrasound or transvaginal ultrasound. Basically I go in and I'm already in pain because it's "that" time brought on by the Provera. So I have this "wand" put places that are uncomfortable. Yeah... it wouldn't have been so bad... but my ovaries were in a "difficult position." It took the ultrasound tech forever and a half to get the pictures taken of what she needed. Basically it was so painful I was laying on the stretcher in the US room crying and asking why me why me what did I do wrong. All I could do was keep reminding myself why I was there, why I was going through all these difficult, painful procedures. I have a very high tolerance for pain... I mean I walked on a broken foot a couple of days after I broke it with only ibprophen. So if this was making me cry, you know it had to have been bad. I'm not looking forward to my next one on the 18th, but I am hoping it will be better because I won't be on my period. I'm so ready to be done with all of this... but I just can't give up. I can't. I have to wait for the doctor to call me with my results and tell me how many follicles I have in there for potential babies. I hope everything looked okay. I wish I could have known right then... I hate all this waiting that is involved in infertility treatment. It seems like my life is forever on hold. I just want a baby... is that so wrong? I hate going into the BX because of all the cribs sitting outside. It hurts to know I might never have one of those in my house.

I started my Clomid today, and so far so good. Nothing crazy is really going on, so I guess that's good.

1 comment:

  1. I had a cyst on my left ovary like 3 years ago, so the next year they made me do another ultrasound, but it was a pelvic one that time. The nurse LEFT ME on the table in the room at Wesley with the wand stuck inside of my when she went to find the Tech because she couldn't locate my left ovary. I was lying on the table, legs shaking, for like what seemed like 20 minutes, and then when the nurse came back alone, she declared that she'd talked to the Tech and I was free to go. Ok? LOL Strangest trip to the hospital ever. I hear you though, it's either Phil or me, we're having the same problem.


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